I try to eat healthy. I eat junk food probably a little more than I should but overall try to eat well.
During a recent medical appointment the doctor asked how my diet was. I said ok, probably could be better. This was followed by do you eat a lot of fast food? And the answer was no.
Ironically on the way home from this appointment, I asked Chris to stop at Dairy Queen. I didn’t just want the chicken strip basket, I needed a blizzard too. After ordering Chris said didn’t you just tell the doctor you eat well. I said yes, but this is just what I needed right now.
I am not an eat in the car person. I felt so overwhelmed after this appointment that I ate the entire blizzard, in fairness it was mini size, before we made it home. (And DQ was about 5 minutes from our house.)
Sometimes we need to indulge. Sometimes we need to have that guilty pleasure because we need the comfort, the break or it’s simply just what we need at that time. And after this appointment that DQ blizzard and chicken basket is just what I needed. And the blizzard I needed right away.
The appointment I was coming from was to meet with an oncologist and genetic counselor at UPenn in Philly. We had a 90 minute conversation about my results and it was incredibly overwhelming. A lot was explained and laid out to us but a lot was not clear and known.
Without getting into too much of my complicated medical situation, genetic testing indicated I have a mutation, it’s just not definitively a BRCA mutation but based on my mom’s history we should treat it like that, maybe. Because the mutation is not known, how to proceed with some things is not known. Mainly the question of if, though it’s more likely when, I’ll also have to my ovaries removed, is what is complicated.
I am already having a bilateral mastectomy after 24 weeks of chemo, delivered a baby in between half these treatments and just really need a break. So the thought of also needing ovary removal was not what I wanted to hear.
And that’s why on that ride home I just needed that blizzard and I couldn’t wait even in the short distance from our house to eat it.
I am not encouraging comfort food eating every time something overwhelming or stressful happens. I’m just encouraging that little extra something we sometimes need to get us through the moment. And in that moment 2 weeks ago, that DQ blizzard was just what I needed.