I know I’m a type A personality and strive to be perfect. The reality is that isn’t achievable. Something I am still working on is accepting that things don’t have to be perfect, it’s ok if they are just good enough.
With both my husband and I working full time and with five kids involved in activities there is not a lot of time. I feel relieved we got where we are going on time. I know I can’t keep up with other families or with stay at home moms but that’s ok.
But I still feel the pressure to keep up, pressure that I create, and this pressure hit me this week. I didn’t plan a party for Bryce or Shane whose birthdays are six days apart. Chris and I are fine just getting a cake for the birthday child and doing a small simple celebration with just the seven of us. I feel bad not doing something bigger for Bryce for his first birthday but it was too much. Too much to plan, too much to clean and too much to organize. It doesn’t make his birthday any less special. It was good enough.
My in laws had us over on the weekend to celebrate both boys birthdays which was nice but made me filled with guilt. My mother in law got two cakes, one for Shane and one for Bryce and sent us home for leftovers so I couldn’t order the donut cake Shane had picked out for birthday as we had a ton of cake now. I told him we can get it next week and that’s good enough.
My nephew brought hand made invitations for his birthday party which is a few days before Alice’s birthday which is in two weeks. We have nothing planned for Alice. Does that make us bad parents? No it’s good enough for us.
At Shane’s school parents can come in on their birthday to read a book, do a craft or play a game. I decided to attempt a craft with the class: a Sonic the Hedgehog one I saw online. After spending way more time than I wanted at multiple craft stores I got what I thought were all the supplies I needed. After attempting to make one myself I realized how terrible I am at this stuff but hopefully the first graders would enjoy it.
I spent the night before breaking up the supplies into four bags for the four groups of desks in his classroom. I felt as if I were preparing to teach a lesson. I was so nervous how it would all go.
Turns out the craft went very well and took just the right amount of time. The kids seemed to enjoy it and were very creative. And most importantly I know Shane was happy I came. It was good enough.
This week is a little crazy. I had my final immunotherapy treatment Monday, Shane’s birthday Tuesday, appointment with my breast surgeon Wednesday (all is fine, just a 3 month follow up), and surgery to get my port out Thursday. I got my next procedure planned out for breast reconstruction at an appointment last week and it will be in early April.
Baseball season starts soon for the boys and Reese’s dance recital is coming up. Spring sports are starting at Mercer and I’ve been really busy at work. And we are getting asked if we can come to an Easter event, my nephew’s party and I’m thinking I got so much going on this week, let me just get thorough that and that’s good enough.
This week is Read Across America week at the boys school so it’s a different themed day each day so I have to remember that as I get their outfits ready each day. Spring break for colleges is coming up and I have to figure out if we still have coverage from our sitters. I have so much to get through with just my life I really can’t even begin to think about parties and events weeks from now. The only way I can make it through is taking it day by day, week by week. And that’s good enough.
I have to remind myself that what other families do doesn’t matter. We do what works for our busy household and that’s good enough. I may not throw parties for each of my kids birthdays but we still find ways to celebrate. And that’s good enough.
The most important thing is being there for my kids. They know we love them and care for them and we do the best we can. It’s hard as a working mom and mom of five but we manage. And sometimes that’s good enough.
#goodenough #workingmom #workingmomguilt #momoffive #onetoughmother